IML

It's been six years since I went to the International Mr. Leather here in Chicago. While no where near a leather worshiper, I am turned on by the sex part of it. I know that I'm very vanilla when I do (the rare times this happens) have sex with another guy. Still, in the back of my head, I like to thinks could go beyond that phase. Gay porn -the standard everyday stuff, gets boring after awhile. Kristin Bjorn has great videos, filled with the hottest looking men in the world, and he films the best sex anywhere. However it does get predictable. The raunchy aspect of the leather set gets me going more than others. Watersports, leather daddies, twinks, and cum eating (taboo now in more conventional gay videos) just makes me feel, I don't know, more dirty? I have no guilt, but maybe its time to admit that this is what I like.

Still, the funny part is, most of these leather guys are around my age or older. While there are young guys and twinks who do it, leather really is an arena for guys who've grown bored with hairless pretty boys. And there in lies my problem. I like younger guys. 18 an older, and up to my age, I like. I usually get cruised by guys older than me. The guys who, shall we be honest, have settled and have let time take its toll. Sure there are some older guys I find attractive, but my tastes do go towards the twinks. The ironic part is, that most twinks have no conversational skills what so ever. While I have a problem with small talk, I always have a better time talking with guys around my age and older.

Maybe I should find a gay sci-fi/fantasy web site? Do they exist?

Anyway, I walked around the dealer room at IML, always impressed with what is out there. Sex is fun, and at least with these guys, its not clean and simple. For these guys, thread count of the sheets are not important (if sheets are even used). The sex is hot, dirty, wet and nasty as hell. You can have yourself whipped, pissed on, cummed on. You can have all sorts of "toys" attached to various body parts, the nipples, your penis and every where else the body tingles.

I don't find it a freak show, as some might. Its just another aspect of our sexuality -whether its straight or gay. I mean there were many straight people/couples who haunted the lower level of the Hyatt Hotel. For these, sex is a game, filled with many choices both fun and squeamish. It's about what turns you on, really.

But for some, this is nothing more than a breeding ground for HIV and AIDS. And there are plenty of booths that make sure you should have safe sex and even some for people addicted to Crystal Meth, a scourge that many in the gay community ignore (but, I've been told by a few friends, that if you don't do drugs, sex is boring).

In the end, though, it a fun time to kill a few hours, seeing how the "other half" lives. Who knows, maybe someday, I can actually join in, versus buying the videos.

But, I think I'm too skinny. Plus, suffering from pectus excavatum (commonly called funnel chest), keep me from fully exploring a dark side that resides in me.