14 November 2022

Books: The Hidden Masters and the Unspeakable Evil by Jack Barrow (2006/2020)

“The Three Hidden Masters – two from Hemel Hempstead, one from Bricket Wood (you’ll get that once you’ve read the book) – are pretty low-key, laid-back guys. Of course, all the beer, rum and weed they consume contribute to that. So when their friend Geoff, the Fourth Hidden Master (from Blackpool), contacts them for help it’s rather an effort for Clint, Nigel and Wayne to mobilize for a weekend trip up there to lend a hand. It seems strange things are afoot in Blackpool. Initially it appears to be confined to the model village Geoff is building, where figures are moving around of their own accord and, even more disturbing, figures Geoff didn’t even make for the village are appearing out of nowhere. If that was the only strange thing happening it could be written off as voodoo gone wrong, which has been known to happen to Geoff on an occasion or two. It quickly becomes apparent, however, that there are larger forces at work in Blackpool. Is it simply that the local council has disturbing plans to turn Blackpool into the Las Vegas of England, or is something more sinister at work, something that could threaten to tear a hole in the fabric of the Universe? Well, whatever it is, the Hidden Masters have to wrap things up by Sunday night… they do have to be back at work on Monday after all.”

Jack Barrow’s The Hidden Masters and the Unspeakable Evil takes a heavy dollop of Douglas Adams, Monty Python, Robert Rankin (it was because of this writer, I found Barrow’s book), and your basic old-style British sitcom of arrested developed men. Then he adds dashes of mystical doings, and you get this often silly, sometimes frustrating work (the book constantly breaks the “fourth” wall and goes off on historical and pop culture references ala Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy that could’ve easily been dropped). A lot goes on here, but your mileage will vary on how much suspension of belief you’re willing to give. I admit, Nigel, Wayne and Clint are interesting heroes (sort of lesser cousins to John Dortmunder and his gang from the Donald E. Westlake books), but I found their single mindedness with alcohol and weed to grow tiresome after awhile –we get it, they love to drink and smoke pot. And they love to argue about nonsensical things and be sarcastic.  

There are, however, some clever ideas here, including when Wayne and Clint actually get pulled into the miniature model village (like in Beetlejuice) and is by far the best bit early in the book. The other set piece I liked was the hotel sequence with the mobsters –but it could’ve been tightened up a bit. And I think, in the end, this could be a great book, a great series, if Barrow’s had a better editor to strengthen the book. The prose is strong, the humor great, and he makes Blackpool his punching bag (though there was once a proposal to transform Blackpool into a casino resort along the lines of the Las Vegas and Atlantic City, for it to become the center point of gambling in the UK). Still, it took me way too long to get through it. While I’ve always appreciated the dry British humor, the jokes do get repetitive (two from Hemel Hempstead, one from Bricket Wood) and so I end up skipping pages.

No comments: